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Saturday, May 6, 2017

Bikini.com Goes Plus

We all know Bikini.com as being a go-to shop for all things swimwear. Now they have a collection exclusively for plus size women, going to a size 24. The brands included are Robin Lawley, Sky+, and Raisens Curve. Below are my faves from the collection:
Raisens Curve Lotus One Piece, $88

Raisens Curve Tortuga One Piece, $88

Raisens Curve Boa Takini, $44
Raisens Curve Pacific Pant, $42

For more plus size option from Bikini.com, click here.

Taking A Punch

If you can't take a punch from life and be able to get up, ice your eye, and keep moving, the world will eat you. I can hear you all thanking me for this vital piece of life advice. Your welcome! 
The old folks would say that you have be able to roll with the punches. In my 32 young, beautiful years of life, I have to say that this is probably the most important lesson I have learned next to do your taxes. Just. Do. Them. The IRS is not f*&cking around! 
What we are talking about is resilience which, in short, is your ability to digest booboo and keep on moving. This is a characteristic that I admittedly do not have. When I get bad news or when something bad and life altering happens to me, the first thing I do is cry for what feels like 7 days and 7 nights. This crying is coupled by texting a friend in panic about the impending doom that I am facing. Then, after this, I usually stuff my face with sugary bs that only makes me feel somehow high and sluggish at the same time. Once the cookies are gone, I lie down for a series of naps. Let my good friend Tortilla tell it, this is called depression, but that is another post.
I outlined all of that to say that that is a waste of time, especially since it is not a ten minute process. I can stay in a funk like this for a LONG time. And while I am checking out from the world, I am missing out on opportunities and fun stuff and just life in general. 
I admire those that can get tossed a raw deal, take a deep breath, and just move on, taking away the lessons they learned. I have started reading a lot of books by women who have, like, made it in life, and this is the quality they all share. Resilience. And right now, your girl TheBG simply doesn't possess it. 
I'm working on it though :)

Wednesday, April 26, 2017

Mother's Day Picks From Macy's

So Mother's Day has has sneaked up on us again! I swear that it was just New Year's Eve yesterday! But don't panic. Macy's has us covered with cute and affordable options for mom's special day. 
Rose Gold Tone Apple Watch, $369

Chanel Summer Makeup Collection, $28-$58

Dior J'Adore Eau de Parfum Spray, $124

Charter Club Slippers, $15.98




Anna Kaiser Happy Hour Event

Celebrity Trainer Anna Kaiser is now collaborating with Target for an active wear collection called C9 Champion Limited Edition by Anna Kaiser. To celebrate, Anna's team traveled around the US doing their Happy Hour, an hour of dance-based aerobics in a pop-up location in Target parking lots. As fun as the music and dance was, I assure you, it was a workout, lol. 


The class exercising at the Happy Hour 

Me and the other ladies after class

Here are some of my favorite pieces from the C9 Champion Limited Edition by Anna Kaiser:






Friday, April 14, 2017

10 Year Fears

I didn't go to my ten year high school reunion. I ended up going to a high school outside of my district, gay boyfriend in toe, for a fresh start. What I got instead was a fresh hell. I won't go into too many deats. Let's just say it was horrible.

On the flip side, I had the time of my life in college. It was how I had wished that high school had been! I had fun. I was social. I had friends. People knew who I was. Yet, my 10 year reunion is later on this year, and I don't think that I will be going to that one either.

Thanks to the soul-imprisoning social network that is Facebook, you no longer need a reunion to keep up with your compadres. A large a mount of my time in the morning is dedicated to going through my Facebook timeline and liking advance degree announcements, manicured hand engagement pics, wedding albums, and job promotion brags. And who can forget the exotic vacation imagery? I feel in my heart that attending my reunion will just make me even more envious and depressed. I would like to see my friends, but I feel like they all have gotten more beautiful with age. Meanwhile, I have gotten fatter when I was already fat to begin with!

I can't believe that it has already be ten years. Where has the time gone?! I have to look at my resume to remember, which is another post entirely. For now, these are my feelings on that: 😒.

I want to go to my reunion, but only if I'm gorgeous and making Arab money. That may sound stupid, but I feel close enough to you to tell you how I feel. We'll see how far I have progressed for my 20 year reunion.

Thursday, April 13, 2017

Almost Honest

Just a few moments ago I was texting a cute guy that I met during a girl's night out at Chili's. He asked me how my day was, and I began to respond. Afterward, I read over my text for grammar errors and immediately realized that I had to erase everything I'd written. I was telling him what a poopy day I'd had. This is a no no! I haven't known him long enough to be honest with him. I replaced my bad day rant with some poppycock about today being awesome because the sun was out. This was the biggest lie of all. The pollen was so heavy today that I thought I was going to have an asthma attack as I walked to work.

Every girl that knows something about anything knows that you don't show too much of yourself to a guy too early. For the first couple of months, you have to be on your best behavior. Never yelling. Down to do stupid stuff on dates that doesn't interest you. No farts. Being an intensely negative person, this means keeping my downer thoughts and the details of my downer days to myself. This stinks because I have so much to say but can't. If you could call my new beau and ask him to describe me, he would probably say that I am quiet. LOL, what a joke!

How awesome the world would be if you could just be yourself off the bat. No secrets. No lies. No wigs- you could just be you. I predict that relationships would end pretty soon, but that would be fine. No one's time would be wasted, and you could move on to the next in good conscience.

But sadly, this is not the way of the world. So for the next month or two, assuming my new beau doesn't drop me because he doesn't get that I'm not responding to him because I literally have nothing nice to say, I have to be Patty Positive, as boring and as fake as she is. You may be shaking your head interneters, but I'm telling you the truth. Nothing puts an end to a young courtship like honesty.

Sunday, February 12, 2017

Trumped: My Best Friend Is A Trump Lover

I try not to get political on my blog, and I know that pretty much everyone in the U.S., no matter what party they claim, is politically exhausted. So, I'll try to be as brief as possible when discussing how my best friend is a Trump lover and I fear that this is going to ruin our friendship.
When he first told me that he was on the Trump train, I thought that he was kidding. You know, just saying something to get on my nerves, like when he says that my head is unusually big. But things got real when he began defending the president's cray-cray like his life depended on it. I couldn't believe my ears! He is a Muslim...in pres love with a man who is slowly but surely trying to band Muslims from the country!
So how does a Muslim Black Man go to the dark side? He is prolife and likes guns, the end. And, behind his loco rantings, he felt that Trump was talking a lot of sense.
Let's be clear: me and this friend agree on very little. We are pretty much opposites on everything in life. It doesn't bother me so much that he is a Trump supporter, but that he we would support a man that is a champion for everything that is against his interest as a Black and Muslim man! And sadly, even thought I know everyone has a right to have their own opinion, his alignment with Trump makes me wonder if he is suffering from something mentally.
LOL, that last remark is what my friend would call a symptom of my liberal arrogance.
This friend and I have argued about everything under the sun but I don't know. When it comes to our discussions on our current political situation, I just get SO mad, and so does he. I just don't believe that he is falling for the hype, he is so smart otherwise.
Again, my liberal arrogance.
So recently, I told him that we can no longer talk politics to save our friendship. He agreed. The sad thing is that this has me questioning him as a person, wondering what else about him is bananas. It makes me feel like I don't know him at all. Fingers crossed that this whole thing blows over and we can go back to our friendship normal: making each other laugh and calling each other names.