I am 30 and I have never been in a serious relationship. Everything I know about love I learned from Sweet Valley High books in middle school. I want to get married so someone else can put in on my student loan debt and help clean up around here. I needed a husband so bad Tuesday when I needed Swiffer wipes but didn't want to leave the house in the rain. Other than that, I don't get the concept of spending forever with someone. So it should be no surprise that the idea of having a baby frightens me to the point that I am hysterical.
"I don't want a baby until I am married and rich enough to take care of it," I told my friend P. This comforts me and gives me time seeing that neither will probably happen.
He is Muslim so he was like, "Just have a baby and Allah will take care of the rest." I screamed in his ear.
When I go on social media and see how many of my friends are having babies, I feel sick. Don't they know that the baby is an expence that will outlive them and most likely grow up to be resentful and ungrateful? Am I the only one that paid attention in health class? As sure as you love that kid today, 20 years from now she will have you on Dr. Phil defending your parenting skills.
I know where babies come from (ouch). I know how much they cost (yikes). And I feel like everyone else does too, so why I am continually asked if I want kids is beyond me. I killed every pet fish I had in college! Babies also take up time. If I had one, when would I be able to sleep and watch Hulu? See, no one is asking these hard-hitting questions!
Truth be told, I like babies, just not enough to have one on purpose. Then again, if I did have one, there could be another alternative as to who can make the rainy trip to the store for Swiffer wipes.
I guess having a baby is an option worth thinking about.
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