The Bedtime Beau Theory

I'm lonely.
Because of this, I made the tragic mistake of going to Netflix on my phone to watch a romantic movie. In case you didn't know, this is typically a HUGE lonely girl no-no. You either walk away from the movie feeling worse or better because you fell for the huggy, kissy BS. Neither one is good.
Anyway, I came across a movie called Our Souls At Night, starring Robert Redford and Jane Fonda. It's about two lonely widowers that decide to cure their loneliness by sleeping together at night because, and this is real talk, the lonelies really get bad at night. And there was no hanky panky. Just talking and light cuddling until they fell asleep. I swear I cried. IT WAS LIKE THEY WERE READING MY MIND! This is what I have been looking for all along!
In the movie, Jane Fonda bravely marches over to Rob's house and is all like, "I'm lonely, you're lonely, let's sleep together. And really sleep, no funny business." And like a man playing hard to get, Robert is all like, "Let me think about it." Then he calls her the next day and is like, "I'm in!" I found myself applauding the lady Ms. Jane Fonda was playing for her bravery. If only I had the balls to ask a man for what I want: some erection-free bedtime cuddling.
The movie wasn't over for three minutes before I went from liberated back to depressed. I haven't met a man in ten years that I would even want to share my bed with, platonically or otherwise. And yes, this is metaphoric because I sleep on my aunt's living room floor. But I understand that what I liked about Rob and Jane's relationship was the intimacy. They were talking. They were sharing. They were caring. THESE DUDES OUT HERE DO NOT TALK, SHARE, OR CARE! The only way I would feel comfy with any of them in my theoretical bed would be if we were in the middle of the ocean, sailing on it to freedom for some reason. I couldn't imagine bedtime with the last guy I was talking to, a barber that wouldn't even offer me emotional support without trying to get me to promise to something physical.
So I guess I am looking for my Robert Redford. I just hope I am not his age when he finally comes along.