Crustville

It's always interesting talking to my friend Alex because we are so different. She lives life outside of the box, and I live life so inside of the box that I am beginning to develop agoraphobia. This was somewhat the theme of our conversation today.
"I turn 34 this year, and I am not sure what to do for my birthday," I explained to her. "Last year I had a tea tasting, and the year before that, I had a movie night."
"Boring!" she exclaimed. "Teas and movie nights are not the way you celebrate getting older."
"I guess I could do something a little more fun," I whimpered into the phone. "I don't want to be old and crusty."
"Girl, you are on your way to Crustville, no stops!" she yelled in my ear.
It's always a little sad when people are hip to something about yourself that you thought that you were hiding. I noticed at my homecoming last year that I'm not as fun as I used to be in my 20s. But in my 20s, I was happy and optimistic, eager to see what life had to offer. Now I know what life has to offer: dead parents, debt, evictions, low credit scores, bad dates, and depression. Nothing about any of these things makes me want to put on a slinky dress and stand outside the club in a line, waiting to stand for another four hours in the middle of a crowded dance floor while drunk dudes bump into me.
"You need to live a little," Alex advised.
I've lived a little. Then life happened, now I'm living la vida in silence. Yes, I am for having a good time, but unlike 20s me, I have no interest in frazzle and minimal interest in dazzle.
"You are right." She was right. She is a good friend, and I am really taking what she said under advisement. If this year has taught me anything, it is that life is short. So, in regards to my birthday, do you think that Groupon has competitive rates on group knitting classes? I have always wanted to learn.