Let's Not Get Physical

I turned 39 the other day and I was excited to go to the aquarium with Bells who is in town for the holidays. I used to make it a point to go to the aquarium annually because it is free for your birthday, but I had not been in a couple of years. Outside of seeing Bells, I was excited about seeing the big turtle. I found out that his name is Tank and I like to see him slow drag across the water. Then my aunty asked me, "Are you going to be able to do all that walking?" I was offended at first. I mean, I'm not handicapped! But just then I remembered: it is a sh&tload of walking! 

Child.

When I tell you that my back was screaming before I even made it to the ticket line! I mean let's be clear: I am in no way delusional about how out of shape I am. Recently, walking through my alma mater's campus for homecoming had me on life support! However, a few years ago I was able to walk the aquarium while taking occasional breaks. The other day, if I could have copped a squat every three steps I would have. 

"Do you need one of those things the old people use?" Bells asked me. 

YES! I screamed in my head. "No, I'm going to walk it," I said, confidently. There was no way I was going to spend my 39th birthday, my last year of youth, being wheeled around the aquarium. I regretted that decision almost immediately. Who needs pride when you have lower back pain? During one of the exhibits, a man wheeled an elderly woman I assume was his mother right up to the tank to see the fish. Wow, she's living the life, I thought. The only issue is that she was like 100 and I technically am not even middle-aged yet. Ridiculous. 

Yall, we were there for hours. At one point, I was willing to throw myself in the Beluga tank if it meant that I could get some rest. On top of being tired and in pain, my anxiety was beginning to crank up. There were misbehaving, screaming children coming out of the ceiling! I imagined myself having to elbow crawl myself through the overpriced gift shop out to the curb to catch my Lyft. 

That didn't happen though. Bells and I left the aquarium and sat outside for a while, people watching and talking. Over 5000 steps later, I was mentally patting myself on the back. I did it! My whole body felt broken, but I did it! When I got home, I collapsed on to the floor of my room for what felt like a second but for what ended up being more than an hour. I did it, but I was celebrating a victory that shouldn't have even been a thing! 2025, I've got to do better. Like, I have to.