Long story short, I am losing at life.
I just started a contract gig and I'm not getting the hang of it while everyone else is being recognized for doing an amazing job.
I have a toothache that is making my whole jaw warm.
I had a health emergency and could not reach my doctor. I had to talk to another doctor who, although nice, is not familiar with me or my issues. I'm sure my actual doctor will tell me something completely different when I talk to her in the morning.
My niece had multiple tantrums that felt like they were taking place on my brain.
I feel like my whole household is annoyed with me for needing some space today.
I called one of my favorite people and he didn't answer the phone which made me feel alone, ignored, and stupid.
At the end of it all, all I could do was lay down and cry. Again. Some more.
I want to talk to someone but I don't care to spread my misery so I think that I will listen to some Toni Braxton and try to regulate my anxiety. Pray. Nibble on dinner.
Nights are my favorite but they are also hard. It is when all my life choices come to haunt me. It is also when it becomes even clearer that I will always be by myself and have to tread the merky waters of my life in solitude forever.
Getting emotional. I think it's time for Toni.
No comments:
Post a Comment