A L.A. State of Mind

Having someone crack jokes in a whisper about me on the plane was my first thumbs up as to how things work in this town.
Living in Atlanta, I never thought that I was "country" until I went downstairs for breakfast in my hotel and realized that they had no grits. Of course, I asked for some and the chef looked at me like I just arrived from the nearest hoedown. He directed me instead to some colorful packs of oatmeal that had interesting heart health facts on the back.
Then I went downtown to my movie event for the L.A. Film Festival. People were nice to me there, but I feel like they were because I had the credentials that said I was supposed to be there. In other places, I said "hello" to people, and they looked at me funny. The people that did speak, I figured, were not from there.
Everyone dresses nice, just like on The Hills. But I had to wonder if anyone knew, especially the women walking around in colorful short dresses and Ugg boots, that there were replicas of their outfits at Target for like ten dollars. For the most part, they have made an art out of wearing expensive brands just to look like they rolled out of bed.
I saw so many women yesterday with such extensive plastic surgery that they looked like humanized cats with loud makeup. There was one older woman with such a high nose that I could not believe that no one every couple of blocks was telling her she looked horrible.
Oh, and the people here are rude by the way. It's like they take extra steps not to talk to you or touch you on the street or look at you. I found myself wondering how people here make friends. Girls in similar outfits would walk in packs, not saying anything, with tall Starbuck's cups and huge shades. It goes without saying that they are unusually thin and shapeless or thin with these huge exaggerated breasts. I mean HUGE! It was nothing like San Francisco which I visited to see a friend of mine. There, hippies would come up and hug you. Here, I just wanted to attempt to hug someone to watch them run from me.
One thing I am impressed with here is the effort the city is making to live Green.  On my way to the festival, bus passed super expensive homes that had light paneling and other tools to heat and cool the home through solar energy. That you do not see at all in Atlanta, and we run through our resources like water.
Besides the rude people and weird surgery, I kind of like it here. They have a lot of green space and there is a different protest every day. However, I do not see myself moving here anytime soon, especially not before dropping 100lbs and finding a grocery store that carries grits.