Holiday Hopeless

Christmas is around the corner and it is about that time that I receive my gift. No, not some perfectly wrapped present under the tree silly. I am referring to the deep, dark depression that takes me over until a few week s after the new year when everyone takes down their Christmas lights and the sales are over.
Aw, holiday depression. It greets me like an old friend every December with its arms open wide, waiting to strangle me with its cloak of sadness and warm me with its ratty robe of misery. This year I thought I had dodged him, seeing that Christmas is about two weeks away. Usually I can feel him slipping in as I have my second helping of mac and cheese on Thanksgiving. But this year, my turkey day was so good and drama free that he decided to be a gentleman and wait a minute until I had the most stuff to accomplish, my bank account was low, and my period was on its way. What a friend!
I am very offended by those holiday depression commercials where one day some white lady is in an over sized sweatshirt with her lip poked out, undoubtedly staring blankly out of a window, until she takes a pill and and two seconds later is wrapping a six foot tree in tensile. See, I know the real story. My grandma, before she lost her mind, was a holiday sadness sufferer. The month was just bad for her. Her husband and mother died in December. How many times had a caught her crying for seemingly no reason as she made dressing? And Ruth didn't have a little pill. All she did was pray her way to January with her fingers crossed.
I chose to just wallow in my pain, the old fashioned way. I find praying over dumb shit while children are starving across the world to be selfish. Not to mention it must be annoying to God.
So if you do not here from me for about a month, fret not. Me and my old friend will probably be gettin' busy until the second week of January. Man, I LOVE this season!