I have been to a few of these homecomings at this point and I am here to tell you that Xavier men marry two types of women: the ones that are very present, in your face, and attached at the hip or "The Caspers"- the ones that you know they married because you saw the pics on Instagram but you never see them in person or with them anywhere since. You need to know this to understand why I am concerned that Nerdy Nadine has gone ghost.
Chocolate Chuck and Nerdy Nadine were an item all the while I was in school. They were a year ahead of me and ALWAYS together. Always. She had a claim on him that was very strong, considering that we were not that far removed from high school. They felt married even then. She was "nice" on the surface. But if you so much as looked at Chocolate Chuck for longer than she deemed appropriate, she would send dagger eyes at you from across the room. I have a few friends that thought he was cute in college and received the Artic shoulder from her. My homegirl Ditzy Diana said she actually hooked up with him and I feared for her safety. Nerdy Nadine was not f*&king around when it came to her man! She even tried to maintain this hold over him once he became Greek, which was sweet but about as fruitful as trying to collect water in a bucket with a hole in it. You see I knew something at 18 that she knew at 19 but was obviously choosing to ignore: Chocolate Chuck was slicker than Vaseline! It is one thing when a guy thinks he's slick. That can be...corrected. But when a guy actually is slick, it's a done deal.
Following the Clues
It first became clear to me that something was up with Nerdy Nadine when Chocolate Chuck became a fixture on other people's IG pages going on trips and stuff without her. Then I ran into him at my 10-year reunion and he was shockingly solo. I very carefully approached him, not putting it past Nerdy Nadine to jump off the top of the University Center and take off my head, Kill Bill style.
"Hey Chuck, where's Nadine?" I asked, looking over my shoulder.
"She is at home with the kids," he said with that pretty, slick-ni*ga smile of his. Let me tell you, the only time I have actually been able to raise one eyebrow was after he said that. Recently, I saw him on IG at his frat brother's house looking gooooood topless poolside. I mean good, like Chic-Fil-A cookie good. The boy was serving body like cocktails! Now Nerdy Nadine and I were not friends in school, but I know she would have never allowed this! Purple Reign took a pic with him at homecoming. He brought up the case before I could even ask him about it.
"I asked about Nerdy Nadine and he was very cryptic. He also was not wearing his ring," Purple Reign confirmed. "I think that they are divorced and co-parenting."
Maybe. But she is still in his IG photo, so I don't know. In my opinion, it is more likely that she is on an island with a lot of other Drexel wives, trying to get a phone signal. The world may never know.
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