Mingle No Mix

Kyndra invited me to a Christian Singles Mix and Mingle and I jumped at the chance to go. I never miss an opportunity to dress nice and possibly meet cute men. As to be expected, there were WAY more women there than men, and out of the men, there were more White men than Black ones.
"Have you found the love of your life?" I asked a woman who sat down beside me, a plate of appetizers in hand.
"Girl no," she said, crossing her legs. "There are hardly any brothas here."
"But there are White guys," I pointed out, nodding to a group of casually dressed White men dancing off-beat to a rap song.
"Girl stop," she said chuckling, nibbling on a meatball.
A long time ago, Jamaica told me that the reason why a lot of Black women were alone is because they refuse to date out of their race. I didn't want to believe it, but this may be true. I do have close Black female friends that are married to Black men, but I have so many single Black homegirls that are lonely and giving up. I wonder if they would be happy and in relationships if they weren't waiting around for Black men that may not come.
"You go talk to one," the same lady dared me. My stomach started to ache. Even back when my Black peers alleged that I wanted to be a White girl, I didn't see myself with a White man. Looking at the White men in the room, as nice as they seemed, made me think of the White athletes from high school that acted like they owned the place with their arrogance and poor attitudes.
"Naw," I said, "I'm just here to have fun."
For the rest of the evening, I watched a really cute Asian girl dancing with a group of White guys, smiling from ear to ear. Meanwhile, my wallflower section of Black women sitting against the wall was growing with every song played. I realized then that Jamaica might have been right: if Black women no longer wished to be single, they were going to have to be willing to mix and mingle with men that are not Black. That is a tough pill to swallow but a reality. This reality, however, doesn't keep me from fantasizing about marrying a Black man. Call me a dreamer.

Go to Church Part 2- The Christian Dork

I was invited to a White Party to celebrate the 30th birthday of my friend Kyndra and her twin sister. I was excited to go! Although I don't look great in white, I love a good party, especially when I know for sure that there is going to be cake.
When I got to the venue with our mutual friend Sarina, I was surprised at the number of people out on the dance floor dancing clumsily while laughing and goofing around. I wasn't there long before it became obvious that I was in the company of dorks. And no, this is not a bad thing as one may think. I have always enjoyed the company of dorks. They like to have a good time and love to live like no one is watching...although everyone obviously is.
While dancing in my seat, a woman came over to me and introduced herself. She told me that her name was Marie, and asked me how I knew the twins.
"I only know one. I volunteer with Kyndra," I informed her.
"Oh cool! I go to church with them."
My heart skipped a beat. I looked past her at the dorks behind her, dancing in circles. I wasn't just in the company of dorks...I was in the company of Christian Dorks. YASSS!
If you are not sure what a Christian Dork is, you either have never been to church or you are one. They are just cool, dope, Christian people who like to act silly and are always happy and friendly. You see, I have experience with Christian Dorks. For a weird period in high school, I was one as a co-president of The Y Club.
Man, those were good times! I loved the retreats with Y-Club members from other schools where we went to Bible workshops and sang Christian songs while a cute dude with long hair jammed along on a guitar. Everyone was so nice and warm and welcoming and just apologetically dorky! At those retreats, I felt like I had found my people. I'm not sure what happened...
I had a good time, dancing and meeting Kyndra's church friends. While munching on cookies with the twins' names on them, I wondered if the fun, light-hearted, I'm not being judged feeling would be what I felt if I started going to church again. The very thought took me back to a period of time when I was 17 and actually happy; a pocket of time where my naysayer attitude had stepped to the side so I could enjoy life.
Marie invited me to their church and I just may go. She said they are Bible-focused and have a really good singles ministry. If I don't like it, I can just leave and pick up a husband on the way out.

Me and Kyndra at her birthday White Party.