The Never-Healing Story

Could anybody tell me how long it takes to truly heal from a crush?
Well, my story is similar to that of any young girl's these days: chub falls for scruffy, blunt, yet lovable character, scruffy pretends to like her back, at least, according to chub, scruffy pulls the plug, chub is devastated, chub "gets over it," chub and scruffy skip into the sunset enjoying a Dawson's Creek-like relationship. It's the stuff fairytales are made out of really.
So I, a.k.a chub, move to Atlanta and begin my young adult life as a budding young journalist in the city of Coca -Cola and nickel bags, while scruff stays behind to continue his education. He is never too far from chub's mind. They are friends.
Where am I going with this?
I thought I would give you background before I jumped into it.
It has been two years. I am still in Atlanta. He is still in school. He has had a girlfriend and I did not freak out. I was actually happy because of course, I was "over" him. He broke up with his girlfriend and I was genuinely sad because I am his "friend." Besides the occasional eye roll I allotted our past, I thought everything was good until I got shitted on. I will tell you about that soon.
After the shit affair, I could not stop thinking about him, the first guy who I feel really, really did me wrong, and I found that I was not mad about my current situation but I was steaming about what happened two years ago.
I was mad because I felt played. I was mad because I allowed myself to get played again, even though my eyes were open. Scruff was not involved, yet I felt he was responsible, and the circus from two years past kept replaying in my mind.
Question: how long does it take to heal after you are done wrong? It has been two years already! Am I always going to revert back when someone does me wrong in the future? Or is it deeper than that? Am I just not over Scruff? Can you ever really get over someone or do you just have to drag the heartache with you wherever you go?
I'm sure you were not expecting me to know the answers, because I don't. All I know is that I see him in the men that I am attracted to, and when I smell gross men's body oils or see a packed parking lot at the Mosque near my house on Friday's the wounds on my heart reopen and blossom wide like sunflowers.
Corny, huh? Oh well, was never good at analogies, but the fact still remains that I don' t know how to feel. If I don't get "over" it soon, I won't be able to feel anything at all when it comes to relationships, and although that would be easy, it's not what I want.