On the 15th at one something in the morning, Curious called me. He said he was on his way home from what I am assuming is work. During the call, the signal dropped. I waited a few minutes for him to call me back, he didn't. So I called him...twice. No answer. The next day I woke-up to no missed calls or unread messages from him, which is unusual. I went into worry mode.
I called him like two other times, no answer. My mind was racing with images of him getting into an accident or being hurt. I mean, the signal just dropped! I went from worried to panicked.
So who else do I text but Brownie, who suggests that he is probably fine, but maybe ignoring me. Me. Me! Maybe he is "flipping the game on me." Me! My mood went from panicked to pissed.
But then I had to step back. We have gone days without calling or texting. Maybe he is busy or something. Whatever the reason is that I have not heard from him, I want to hear from him...desperately.
Staring at my phone before I sent him my trillionth text, I was mad at myself for playing with this boy's emotions. I do like him. Instead of being annoyed by his...at times...tasteless sex talk, I should have just told him it made me feel weird and to stop instead of not answering his texts. And when he told me, well, texted me that he wanted to be thought of sometimes, he was being real with me. Would it have killed me to have called him?
The only thing worse than playing games in the first place is not knowing when to stop. I sit here shaking my head. Why was I trying to get a guy who liked me to like me more? I feel so stupid.
So I texted Brownie that I think that I am in love, and he told me I wasn't. Maybe I'm not. But in the event that I hear from Curious again and that boyfriend offer is still on the table, I'm going to take it.
No comments:
Post a Comment