Here is the thing: I find myself nearly fiending for male attention, but when I get it, no matter how G-Rated, I feel like a tramp! And I don't like being by myself. True, I have been most of my life. But this past month, I have had a dude or two to like hold me, and it's been really nice and really addicting. But now, when a guy is not here, when he is doing something selfish like working or sleeping, I feel more alone than I ever remember feeling when I was completely by myself.
My emotions put me in mind of some game that Dorothy schooled me to...that I ignored until now: "Don't wish for a guy to come around, because you think you are lonely now, but you will REALLY be lonely when he leaves."
I'm needy. I own it. It's true. But I feel like I have held on to my hymen for a second here...don't I at least deserve someone to come around and hug me...when I demand that they do it? I don't know...I'm just sayin'.
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